Friday, August 17, 2007
ON BEING SINGLE
From the "I couldn't have said it better myself" department:"My friend Ray...said he hoped he'd die quickly - in a car accident or skydiving - because the idea of dying alone was the one part that really worried him. When I asked my friend Eve if she ever got nervous, she said, "It's age. I started worrying when I turned thirty-seven. You wonder if you'll always be alone because you've gotten so used to it. It's scary and weird because you're living it, but also trying not to think about it because if you thought too much about your life you'd never get out of bed." - Amy Cohen / The Late Bloomer's Revolution (link on left nav bar)
Read or Post a Comment
I don't mind being single. In fact I like the freedom to be and do whatever I want without restriction, without considering what someone else may feel or want. However, when there are times of sadness, times where I really could use input or yes, on my death bed, I know and I am sure that I will wish I had someone. Maybe I will. Who knows... Is this akin to praying to God before one dies? You know, when you lead an enjoyable life of sin prior? Maybe being single is having the opportunity to live it up any way you choose and accepting that the price is making decisions by yourself, caring for yourself and being on your death bed alone save your family and friends. i dunno...doesn't sound too bad.
I wish that I could fully subscribe to that mentality. It definitely makes being single much more glamorous, and in theory, I do agree with it, but the reality is that I just get lonely.
I know the grass is always greener and there's plenty of married folks who'd enjoy being single again, if not just for a little while. And it's not that I want to find someone just so that I'm NOT single. I would much prefer to live a solitary life than to be with someone I just felt "eh" about.
For me, it's really just about being lonely and missing that connection with someone. As much trouble Bob and I had, we had that connection and love - and I miss that.
I think being alone almost every day is part of the problem. I work from home, so I'm home alone all day. Thankfully, I have really great friends that are almost always willing and available to go out, so that fills in the gaps quite a bit. If I didn't have that, I think I'd go crazy.
But when you get invited to a wedding and have no one to go with, or just want to go grab dinner or a movie and have no one to go with, it really makes the glamour of being single (at 35) shine just a little less, you know?